Traveling with the Aspie

We don’t travel much.  Actually, neither me or Justin have ever been on a plane (or a train).  We do love to explore, though, and we often go for drives just to get out of the house.  We start getting crabby with each other if we don’t.

Since we are childfree (by choice!), we can go anywhere at any time and explore the amazing state of Washington without any problems.  We love to just get in the car and go.  But traveling with Justin has its issues.

Justin has a routine before we go anywhere (even the store).  He probably doesn’t realize he does, but I certainly do.  They say the women usually take longest to get ready, but I beg to differ!  He has to make sure he has the right shirt and pants and belt on, make sure he has the right hoodie, get his shoes, put on cologne, then smoke.  I can’t stand and wait for him, or he feels like he’s rushed and it annoys him (sometimes I am rushed, which I’m working on).  Once he’s finally ready, then I usually get ready, because chances are, he’s forgotten something in his routine, and he has to do it or he gets crabby.

We all know by now autistic people have routines and they have to abide by them or they tend to get irritated and that’s when meltdowns can happen.  But I wonder if this is something that all adults with autism struggle with?  Just leaving the house–does that require certain steps or they just can’t handle it?

Once we’re finally in the car, it’s usually me driving (hello, no DUIs here).  I get comments from him–a lot.  He probably doesn’t realize it, but he will make a lot of comments on the way I’m driving or ask why I don’t take certain roads or why I’m hitting the freeway instead of going through town.  Sometimes it really irritates me–but I remember that this his brain is probably just a little weirded out because it’s part of his routine to go a certain way or drive a certain way.  It’s his Aspie routine, and that’s how he likes it!  It doesn’t piss me off or drive like an ass just because he commented, but I’ve noticed it’s usually every time we drive he will comment on something that’s unusual or unexpected of him.

travel

I know Justin stresses a lot about driving, and he doesn’t drive by himself much.  He’s constantly stressing that his car will break down (even mine, which is completely under warranty and only 4 years old) and it’s the unexpected-ness of it that really freaks him out.  We’re hoping we can find him a specialist to help with this stress and worry he tends to have.

At any rate, I’m curious what it’s like for other Aspies out there to travel.  What is your routine of leaving like???

–TARA–

Hyper Irritability…it’s A Thing

Yesterday was a rough day for Justin and I.  I work full time for a law firm, and Justin had to quit his last job because of his Autism causing him to pass out  (it’s a thing).

Justin was irritated. Not with me, or anything in general really. He was bored. He was hungry and nothing sounded good. But it wasn’t the irritable feelings normal neuros experience.  We find something to do and eat whatever we find.

I didn’t know what hyper Irritability was so I researched yesterday to see if ASD could cause it. Well, yes. And it’s exactly what Justin was experiencing.

Imagine–you’re annoyed with the world.  But nothing will help that feeling. I imagine it’s like PMS but without the super bitchy attitude and anger.  But what sucks is nothing sounds good or like it will resolve your irritability. “Watch a movie.” No. “Play video games.” No. “Have a grilled cheese.” No. It’s like dealing with a child sometimes which is frustrating because all I want to do is make him happy and loving life. I feel sometimes I fail at being a wife when he’s that irritated.  But really, there’s nothing I can do about it.

What do you all think? Do you experience this too? What’s the best way to overcome that feeling?

Thanks to all my new subscribers.  I hope this reaches people who can use the love and support and experiences we have!